Erika's Presence

Dearest friends,

Erika's presence was certainly felt while we celebrated her life:

There were some who came a day or two previous and left flowers, a rosary and a balloon. Those flowers fed the local deer population. Left behind and uneaten was an anonymous letter to Erika.

It was a cloudy day when we arrived, but the sun soon broke through and it turned into clear blue skies by the time we left.

An unknown person (to us) who knew Erika when he was 10 years old, a little brother of one of Erika's good friends, came to pay his respects while we were there. He joined in our celebration.

We shouldn't forget about Edward Romero, who passed just two days later.

A ladybug landed on Marcela's lap.

Erika and Dad loved to watch Pee-Wee's Playhouse on Saturday mornings and read the funny papers on Sunday mornings.

There was a discussion about flickering lights.

Erika loved hoop earrings.

A funny story was told about new earrings and Erika's dog.

Old engravings in the tree are faded from time but still there.

We laughed more than we cried.

Old friends re-connected and new friendships were made.

Today was a good day.


Fred Harmon
08.25.12
Rev. 08.26.12

Link to Facebook group

Here is a clickable link to the Facebook Group of the same name.  Friends and family, please feel free to join the group and share your memories and / or photos of Erika.

http://www.facebook.com/groups/364154923652780/

Fred Tiberius Harmon

20 Years Ago Today

Dearest friends,

20 years ago today we lost someone special. To some, she was beloved family. To others, she was a cherished friend. As for me, I didn't get to know her for very long, but she was the right person for me to meet at the right time, and I feel like I owe her a lot for her friendship.

Marcela, Curtis and I shared some time together reminiscing about Erika. Since my set of memories has nearly been washed away with time, I mostly listened as they told me stories about particular photographs of Erika, how she was sweet, free spirited and very loving yet with a firey personality. When she came home, everyone knew. I commented that I remembered her unique voice and yet I can’t seem to describe it. I showed Marcela pictures of my family, and was surprised to find out that Erika was a 10-pound, 10-month baby! She was also a baby who learned to walk before she really knew how to crawl! I found out that she was a transfer in from another high school (Kennedy) when I met her. I guess that in a way she was just as new as I was and yet making friends came to her so naturally. Marcela told me that if Erika liked you, she nurtured you. If she didn’t, then watch out! I’m glad in Erika’s eyes, I was categorized in the former.

Marcela loved taking pictures of Erika and I could see that in the great photographs that she took. Shared with me, and now with her permission, shared with you is one of Marcela’s favorite pictures of Erika: a moment captured while she was doing homework. A simple moment. A beautiful moment.

Warmest regards,
Fred Harmon
08.25.12

Erika poses for a photo in the family room.

Erika on the phone

Father Curtis Griffin and Daughter Erika before a Father / Daughter dance.

Father Curtis Griffin and Daughter Erika before a Father / Daughter dance.

Erika sketch

Welcome to "In Honor of Erika Marcela Griffin"

Welcome to "In Honor of Erika Marcela Griffin", my tribute to someone I knew for a brief yet meaningful time. I've shared my memories of her in the posts below starting, in Facebook timeline fashion, from the bottom. I invite friends and family to join and share / post their memories and / or photos at:

http://www.facebook.com/groups/364154923652780/

I will also copy and paste your post to this blog.  I can remove it or post it as anonymous at your request. If you wish to post anonymously, you can email me at: in.honor.of.erika.griffin@gmail.com or message me and I will post it for you. This tribute group will be heavily moderated for profanity or unwelcome postings.

Regards,
Fred Harmon

Part 5:

She left an imprint in my heart and mind that I'll carry with me for the rest of my days. She taught me that it's okay to get to know new people, different people, not just those inside of one circle. She taught me how easy it could be to talk to people, to laugh with them. Her kindness and charm were infectious. Even though I played such a small role in her life, I feel so fortunate that, quite by chance, I was seated next to this joyful girl, and that I was able to have known her for those few moments in that classroom each day. Even though she played such a small role in my life, after all these years, Erika's kindness still resonates within me.

She was truly one of those people who were destined for great things, though fate and a moment of carelessness would have different plans. Upon reading more about her in my school newspaper and yearbook, all within sixteen and a half years: she traveled the world, she certified herself in CPR and life guarding and everyone who knew her loves and misses her. Even though I barely scratched the surface of our friendship, even if our paths might have never crossed again after high school, I dream to know how much better the world would be if destiny had won that warm night in August nearly 20 years ago.

Fred Harmon
rev 08.10.12

 

Part 4:

5 years removed from high school, 8 years after she passed, I had a dream. It was a vivid, clear dream of my old friend Erika. Nothing was said and nothing happened. She simply looked at me as if we were face-to-face, but hers faded in and out like a candle was flickering in front of her. It was a single event that seemed to last for hours and yet it was probably a dream that lasted but a few seconds before I awakened. I don't often remember my dreams when I wake up, but this time I did. I remember opening my eyes as I felt something strike me deeply in my waking moments. I don't often retain my dreams long after I've woken up, but this time a longing stuck with me in the days that followed.

I dug up some artifacts from high school, a school newspaper that was published after Erika’s passing and also my sophomore yearbook. The newspaper was old and yellowed from time but in good shape for being packed away for nearly a decade. I opened it and read each of the touching articles and poetry written for Erika. I opened the latter and found tributes in ads bought in Erika’s memory by her friends. Typed across the top was her birthday and I realized that it was quickly approaching. Though I hadn’t drawn anything of importance in years, I felt compelled to start and finish the sketch she had asked me to draw so long ago and find her. The school newspaper led me to the Chapel of the Roses which led me to where she is. After the long journey I finally found her, paid my respects and then decided that the family should keep her gift and traveled to Moreau to ask the Principal to pass it along.

 

Part 3:

Though I didn't find a way to hang out with her outside of that classroom, we'd share a smile and a few words in passing through the hallways. I showed her my sketchbooks in class, mostly comic book art, nothing special or particularly artistic but she liked them anyway. She asked me to draw her, and I took note of her request for the entire year. I always asked for more time and she simply agreed, but I was not able to deliver by year's end. As the following summer came to a close, while sifting through my sketch books at home, I thought back to Erika's request and I told myself that I should start that sketch at some point so I could finally deliver on that promise.

When I returned to school in August, the atmosphere seemed odd. People were happy to see each other after the long summer, but they were talking about a fellow student who suddenly and tragically passed away. Erika. Erika!? No... I was confused and stunned. From chatter in the hallways, school announcements confirmed what had happened. A mass and memorial soon followed, and I didn't know what to make of all of it. It was all happening so fast. Some of her friends paid tribute and I stayed in the back of the gymnasium grouped with students who didn't know her. I couldn’t process what was happening and I felt withdrawn, so I faded into the crowd. I knew her for a small portion of 45 minutes of each school day for a little less than 9 months. To some that may not even be equivalent to being an acquaintance, but to me it was real and it was profound and I was neither wise nor strong enough to join her friends simply because I didn't know them and they didn't know me.

In the following months, school life continued. In years leading to the end of high school I turned myself around and did what I could to pass kindness along to others and be a little more social. I participated in the school's Youth Educator Program. I wrote, illustrated and photographed for the school yearbook and school newspaper. I ran and eventually mentored in track and field. Though when high school ended, I severed most ties with it and my life moved on, forgetting even about my good friend Erika.

 

Part 2:

One of the memories I still hold is one day I was reaching down for a book on the ground and I glanced over at Erika. Her piercing blue eyes nearly struck me down to a faceplant right then and there! I didn't have those kinds of feelings toward her since she was my friend, but my 14-year-old self understood and appreciated what a beautiful girl looked like in that moment.

Part 1:

I was a freshman at Moreau in 1991-1992 with old friends drifting apart and few new people I felt comfortable being around. High school for me was off to a rough start and though I had some new friends, others around them treated me as some sort of hostile invader trying to push my way into their circles. These closed-minded individuals acted with unwelcoming immaturity. Being a freshman, I was a little awkward and a lot shy and found it unusual and a bit shocking to be thrust so quickly into this social experiment. It was like learning how to swim by being tossed into the deep end. At times, getting to meet new people seemed discouraging.

During my morning Spanish class I was seated next to an upperclassman for a few months, a sophomore. I don't remember the person to my left, I don't remember my teacher's name and I probably couldn't even remember three other people in that class, but I do remember the pretty girl to my right. She lit up the room. She was so easy to talk to. People were drawn to her; she was popular. She didn't treat me differently because I was younger or awkward or less popular. We laughed together. I looked forward to seeing her every morning. Erika made me feel welcome.

 

Prologue

Welcome to "In Honor of Erika Marcela Griffin", my tribute to someone I knew for a brief yet meaningful time.

-----

On May 20th, I had a fleeting thought of her as I sometimes do and later that day realized that her birthday had passed just 4 days before. Though the passage of time has whittled my memories of her down to just a few, I always recall her fondly. And even though the images of her in my head need to be updated by the few pictures in my high school yearbooks, I can recall some of the events which took place during my time knowing her. With the permission of the Griffins, I wish to share my story of knowing her with you, a short but great 9 months.

I invite anyone who knew her to join and share their memories / photos of this extraordinary young lady. If you wish to post anonymously, you can email me at: in.honor.of.erika.griffin@gmail.com or message me and I will post it for you.  You may post in a comment here or follow this link to the Facebook group made in her honor as well.

http://www.facebook.com/groups/364154923652780/

Regards,

Fred Tiberius Harmon